Understanding the Character of God: Godless Jews on National Public Radio

March 24, 2014

I was listening to NPR this week, and this guy, who was a Jew but obviously only as a nationality and not as a religion. After listening to him for a couple minutes I just had to turn it of, because he was so anti-religion, and speaking irreverently about Christ; but before I turned it off he mentioned that in the Jewish tradition the Messiah wasn't expected to be a God. My initial reaction to this was "What!? What are you even saying? you're ridiculous." Then I thought about it for a minute and decided it may be a valid description of Jewish belief, after all, he is a Jew, and I'm not. So in my scripture study the next couple days I read up on some of the Old Testament prophecies about the Messiah. Lookingthrough some of the Messianic prophesies there is very little refference to the Messiah being a God, or the Son of GOd, and what is there for the most part is actually quite hidden, if you're not  reading it with the perspective already in mind that the Messiah was the Great Jehovah of the Old testament coming to earth to Atone for the sins of the world. It helped me understand why Isaiah and Jeremiah were continually lamenting about the blindness of the people, and the passages about how the Lord blinded them because of their wickedness - I didn't read all of the prophesies in the Old testament, but I did read a good handful, and the only one I found that explicitly referred to the Messiah as being a God was Isaiah 9:6. Shortly after that I was reading Abinadi's prophecies, as he talked about how the Son of God would come to suffer for the sins of the world, how salvation didn't come through the law of Moses, and that the law of Moses was given to point the people towards Christ. It was like I was reading those words for the first time, and understanding more the full import of what he was saying, and the context in which he was saying it.  It was so powerful.  It makes me want to go through the scriptures and just read all of the prophesies of Christ. 

I realized also, as I was reading the words of Abinadi that day, how truly remarkable, unique and powerful the Book of Mormon is in it's testimony of Christ: all of the prophets which have testified, have testified of coming of Christ and His Divinity, but none (at least that we have record of) so powerfully as those in the Book of Mormon. the Divine Sonship is first preached by Nephi. Nephi was exceedingly fond of plainness in prophesy, and prophesied  very clearly that the Messiah who was to come was the Son of God, coming to earth dwell in the flesh, and to Atone for our sins.  The Atonement, I've noticed, is another aspect - that even modern Christianity doesn't really understand - that the Book of Mormon testifies of so often and so clearly. I love the Book of Mormon, it is so beautiful and so powerful - I am so grateful for the precious truths it contains that otherwise would have been lost to the world. (Except through modern revelation, of course, but they both kind of came in the same package. :)  We take those truths for granted, though, especially the truth about Christ.  I am grateful I was able to see a little more of their significance this week, and I hope I can continue to do so.  And now that I think about it, I think most of what I've been doing as I've been studying to know the character of God is not learning new facts, just understanding the significance of what I've already been taught.

Moral of the story? Sometimes it's good to listen to atheistic Jews blaspheme on National Public Radio for a few minutes and challenge your beliefs, because it helps you see your beliefs in a new light.  Just kidding, the real moral of the story is that God is merciful and uses unexpected circumstances to help us draw closer to Him

Understanding the Character of God: Leaning on His Arm and Jacob 5

March 17, 2014

So I've been noticing this week how much writing weekly missionary emails has helped me grow spiritually.  It's so neat!  like I said before writing down and sharing my thoughts about the scriptures has helped me solidify my testimony, grow in my spiritual understanding, and feel the Spirit.  But even more than that I've started looking for spiritual experiences that I can share in my daily life, which has made me actually really look forward to writing every week. (Of course not every spiritual thought or experience makes it into my emails, but it's helped me make life a more spiritual experience.)  Also, a couple months ago I was particularly depressed that all of my friends were gone, and I wouldn't be able to be friends with them in the same way for another year or two; after a while though, I realized that I had an opportunity to strengthen my friendships with those serving missions in a way that's not really possible otherwise, and be blessed for it.  This is definitely part of that. Thank you for being on a mission, and thank you for writing to me and letting me write to you! [ Editor's note: Again, not exactly thoughts about the character of God, but I thought including a plug for writing missionaries was totally appropriate :D]

I have not been as diligent in reading my scriptures this week, though, so I haven't had as many insights, but I did have one really cool experience I wanted to share.

Before one of my Mock Trials Sam pulled me aside and warned me that the coach of our opposing team the next day was jerk and not to let him get to me, along with some other stuff. I don't get scared that often, but I was kind of scared after he told me that.  I had already been feeling very self-conscious about how young I was, how little I knew, and how new I was to coaching. I felt so little. I felt so alone. In addition to that I've always hated direct conflict - 9 times out 10 I will just deffer to the other person to avoid any kind of conflict - and I'm not good at standing up for myself; but it wasn't just myself I would be needing to stand up for, it would be my team - which would mean I would have to engage in the conflict because the wronged party would be someone other than me, someone that I had a particular stewardship over - but I still didn't know if I could do it. It sounds pathetic, I know, but I was scared.  The next morning before the trial I carved out some time to read the scriptures, and as I read I saw a mental image of myself leaning on God's arm - as I was leaning not only was His arm supporting me, it was protecting me, too. Then I remember the scriptures "Cursed is he that putteth his trust in man, or maketh flesh his arm," "but for all this His arm is stretched out still," and the like. As I indulged and followed that image I felt safe.  It didn't matter anymore if I wasn't strong enough on my own to face the coach that was a jerk. It didn't matter if I was little, or inexperienced. And I wasn't alone - I had the God of all creation supporting me, and He will never leave me alone.  I realized that we are all children in God's eyes, He is our Father; and it's perfectly okay to feel, or even be inadequate, childlike, and uncertain. In fact we're supposed to become as little children, to be humble enough to recognize our need for Him, to lean on His arm, and to let Him guide us.  I felt God's love so strong, like I could feel His arm around me, and I was comforted. He will not leave us comfortless.

This experience also helped me understand in a new way the scripture that says "We have known and believed the love that God hath for us. God is love; he that dwelleth in love dwelleth in God, and God in Him...There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment in it. He that feareth hath not been made perfect in love." (1 John 4:16-18. I love the whole chapter, it's one of my favorites. I had a lot of it memorize at one point.)

I love how that scripture applies to daily life, too (like walking around downtown Salt Lake.)  If you love people and recognize them as God's children there is no reason to be afraid of them - cautious in certain circumstances, but not afraid.

March 10, 2014

 I think Jacob 5 is one of my favorite chapters in the whole book of Mormon. I love it so much, I think it teaches so beautifully and clearly the tenderness of God's relationship with man.

Understanding the Character of God: Turning Our Hearts, Priesthood Blessings, and Sharing My Testimony

March 3, 2014

The first thing I want to mention is that I figured out, partly from the letter I wrote last week, that if I want to have grand spiritual experiences learning the principles of the gospel, or the character of God I have to write my thought about the subject down or share them with other people. I kind of figured this would be the case, but now I know for sure.  And it's not really a whole bunch of grand spiritual experiences, it's a process where the Spirit slowly saturates your life over time as you continue to consistently read, write, and pray. Which I also already knew, but forgot to apply to this situation. Isn't it funny how that happens?  I feel like that happens to me all the time - I know the answers, I just assume they don't apply to me, or in this circumstance, or because of some fact or other. Well, they do. Principles are principles, and truth is not esoteric.

Anyway, because I've been consistently reading, marking, and writing my thoughts about the Book of Mormon I have been so full of love and beautiful contentment this past week.  For the last several months I haven't been enjoying teaching, and I've been irritated at all of my students - I've also been super stressed, and getting worn out super fast - but this week, I'm pretty sure because I've been making a focused effort to come closer to God through my scripture study - I've felt so much love for all of my students, and for everyone I'm with, and I've been so much happier, and I haven't felt completely dead or unsatisfied at the end of every day. 

I've also been visiting my great Aunt Alice regularly do work on family history stuff, and I'm pretty sure that has contributed to it, too. I always feel the Spirit so strong when I'm at her home. She has so much love for everyone, and for God, she's so inspiring.  I love listening to her stories and learning from her. There are so many things we can learn from the elderly; talking to my aunt has widened my view of mortality immeasurably, and really helped me to refocus on the things that matter. There are so many things that she was once able to do that she can't any more, and it's very frustrating to her; she's had several brain surgeries so her memory and ability to express herself clearly have been greatly decreased - which she greatly laments - but still she tells me how good her life is and how greatly she is blessed; and still I see her cheering up all the other ladies in their little elderly community with her kind words. Any time any of the other ladies see me with her they make it a point to come tell me what an amazing, loving person my aunt Alice is.  I have come to love her so much in the small time I've been getting to know her. I was named after her, and anytime I visit her , or even think about her, I think of the scripture in Helaman 10, where Nephi is telling his sons that he named them after Lehi and Nephi so that "when you remember your names ye may remember them; and when ye remember them ye may remember their works; and when ye remember their works ye may know how that it is said, and written, that they were good."  And it makes me want to be like her. [Editors note: this part isn't strictly about the character of God, but visiting with my aunt has helped me learn of the goodness of God. Visiting elderly relatives is such an amazing blessing. If you have relatives remotely close to you VISIT THEM. Turn your hearts to your "fathers" so God doesn't smite us all with a curse! Ask them about their childhood - it will be just as much a blessing to you as it is to them, I promise.]

Another thought: tonight my dad asked my Grandpa for a blessing for guidance in some things he is working on and it occurred to me - another one of those facts that I always knew, but forgot I knew - that priesthood blessings literally are someone speaking for God, saying the words He gives them to say.  We have access to direct and exceedingly specific personal revelation from God, right in our home. 

After my dad got a blessing a couple of my other siblings wanted blessings, too, and so did I.  The counsel and blessing the were given to me tonight were almost all things that I had felt impressed about, or promptings I'd received in the past month or two. Which made me realize, again something I already knew but hadn't understood as fully, that I have direct access to exceedingly specific personal revelation from God, when ever I am worthy of the companionship of the Holy Ghost, and willing/able to listen. 

That is a tremendous blessing, and no one outside this church has it. We are so blessed, and I wish everyone could have that privilege in their lives to bless and help them as it's blessed and helped me. It is literally a saving grace.